Hello, my name is theTaro and I have a drinking problem

Okay I don't in the conventional sense which there are a couple of you out there who would disagree.  Y'all can shut up.  Well I might, but I feel I don't drink any more than any homosexual working in a bar.  Let's be honest.  What I do mean though is I drink to fast.  Regardless of the substance i just drink it super quickly.  Doesn't matter what's in my glass, be it water, diet coke, vodka soda.  I'm just always so damn thirsty.  Its not my fault.  So. . . with that said, when I go out drinking I drink.  Cocktail cocktail cocktail.  By the time I'm starting to feel it and think to myself "Whoa, I need to slow down" its already to late.  I've already drank enough and once the rest of it hits me I'm done-zo.  I have to consciously make an effort to space out my drinks.  Ugh man. . . Along those lines.  I've drastically starting eating less.  Let me tell ya: not eating much means you don't have to drink NEARLY as much.  Friday I drank what normally wouldn't have affected me as much and man was I tossed.  Yup, gotta watch out for that!

Last night there was a Grindr party at my workplace.  Now I wasn't working but instead of being home alone on a Saturday with my dog (Lord knows I love her) I went out to the bar.  Wasn't really anything exciting.  I was actually a bit disappointed.  For those heterosexual reader(s) out there, Grindr is an application that lets you know where the nearest glitterbenders are.  You make a profile, chat, and send each other pictures of your pachanga.  How I spend most of my mornings.  There wasn't anything exciting and needless to say I didn't get the eleven Latinos in or around my body like I had planned.  For more information on Grindr click the link.

Other news!  At my workplace there is a bartender who is also a drag queen and hosts a variety show.  That's not the news, the news is I'm performing in it next week!  I was going to perform in another one and suggested drag which the host wasn't to keen on that idea.  Well, since then, I went out in drag and borrowed a pair of boobs.  He asked if I was planning to paint.  Hah!  We'll see.  Let me know what you think by text or e-mail.  Oh, and I decided on what I was performing.  The theme of the show is Hollywood and the songs have to have been made famous in a movie.  Every homosexual variety show needs a little Sondheim in my opinion thus my choice was selected from the movie Dick Tracy.  Sooner or Later.  And with that I will leave for your viewing pleasure:

AND. . . I'm back!

Phew I bet all you reader(s) saw that statement and let out a big ol' sigh of relief.  I will catch you up on most of what's been going on in my life and try to leave you with a deep thought or too.  I've been adding to a note on my phone of the subjects we here at TheTaro need to cover so fear not!

Where we left of with our young adventurer he was worrying and fretting over the impending doom on International Thespian Conference.  Turns out it was better and worse that he anticipated.

Oh yes!  I started you out with that image.  This lovely model is wearing a Renaissance style gown in silver, isn't she lovely.  Not only was she not embarrassed to wear it, but she rocked that thing around the  whole convention center while taking a phone call.  Bless her heart.

That was not the worst of it.  I got confused as a high schooler not once but twice, though the second time it was by another high schooler who was hitting on me.  Teach me to shave (as if that would do anything).  Also had to teach two workshops which were exhausting.  The kicker though was that my boss was assistant directing the All-State Show.  This is wonderful news!  Except that all those responsibilities that she would normally be in charge of and taking care of fell to me.  Yes.  I was in charge of the kids the whole weekend.  Bless THEIR hearts.  Don't get me wrong, my kids are an amazing group of students and don't do anything wrong, but I count myself fortunate that I would be accidentally be procuring any of my own.

Next item on the shopping list is Walmart at twelve.  The Asian implored us all to come over one evening, I believe it was a Tuesday, and wouldn't tell us why.  Well, as most of my nights back then involved drinking this was no exception.  The gang headed over to her place whilst picking up a tag-a-long and arrived a bit late.  We got there only to discover we were going to Walmart to pick up things she needed.  I'm firmly against this store as the Asian knows but went along for the sheer adventure.  The list included sharpies, glasses, and a couple other knick-knacks; I of course took the oppurtunity to acquire some lovely pink, $4, women's booty shorts.  With said, or written I suppose, items in hand we returned to drink some more and start the actual activity.  This was: we were to take a glass and write issues or problems on them.  After having filled out four each we went to a deserted area and broke them.  The idea behind it was a spiritual act of releasing frustrations and moving on from issues in your life.  I get it, I do.  Didn't really work for me though.  I think honestly its because so many of my feelings etc are so internalized that trying to embody them in a physical manifestation just doesn't work for me.  I would have to carry the glasses around with me.  Have the people on them carry them.  Drink out of them for a while, and I don't even know if that'd work.  Sorry Asian, but I appreciated it.

Right before that, the Armenian came to visit.  (naming him that makes me sound racist with "The Asian" already, I may have to name him something differently.  We'll see)  Trips with him generally involve an excursion to Disneyland and this one was no exception.  It was a fun day including us looking for Phill and hanging out in his car to charge our phones so we could meet up with his dancer. . . Hah, thats all on that one I think.

With that we'll move on to the more influential and recent charge in my life.  I moved.  The lease ended on the old place and my roommates moved to a cute house in MoVal.  Not thats not very conducive to my lifestyle (I'm white [well, mostly]).  Not the only reason, its 10.1 miles from the bar.  I have no means of conveyance.  So I looked for a place downtown.  A cute apartment to call my very own.  Well, after staying with the Asian for a few weeks I ended up moving back in with my old roommates. . . turns out, the old man next door is white.  And there's a pool.  And I'm already a little sunburnt.  I'm happy.  I just need to organize things and get settled and I think I'll be comfortable, sans the inconvenience of getting home on Friday nights. -shrugs-  Willow also doesn't like the pool and won't come near if we're outside. I may or may not have thrown her in. . .

Side note: I'm singing in a variety show, so if you can think of a song made famous by a movie let me know.  Can't be animated.  

My personal demons haven't really let up either so I'll leave you with this song by my favorite American song writer: